HOT Communication

The next time you communicate, just think about H.O.T.

Healthy - Is the communication or conversation you are having healthy for you and the other party. We all know that eating junk food is bad for us. Sometimes, we speak to others like we are giving them verbal junk food. Worse, our internal thoughts might be the most unhealthiest messages. 

Onward - Do you tend to speak from your mind and try to get all your thoughts out or do you tend to carry the conversation onward because you are listening to what the other person is saying and adding to the conversation?

Thoughtful - Communication should be mindful. Too often, we just say things on the top of our minds without thinking. Take some time to construct your thoughts. Usually, we are thinking about so many things, all the little pieces comes out jumbled. Imagine how that sounds like to another person.

Puzzle

Communication is a like a puzzle.

You have to take bits of information and piece them together to make sense. 

If the pieces don't fit together or if there's any confusion, then it's hard to form the whole picture.

The puzzle will be incomplete if pieces are missing.

The thing about communication is that sometimes there's no finished product to replicate. It's a new puzzle that you have to create and solve each time.

Grandfather's Story

After a listening workshop, a participant approached me and told me that her grandfather shared this with her:

"When people tell you a story for the first time, pay attention to them. If that person comes back again and tells you the exact same story, what should you do? You have to really listen to them and pay more attention to them.

But what happens, if that same person comes back again and tells you the same story with the same details and same everything? 

You have to really be mindful and give them your undivided attention. Do you know why?

Every time that person is sharing their story with you, it's not because they want to be annoying, they are sharing how they are feeling with you."

You see, most people would stop paying attention or even interrupt midway and say, "You told me that already!". When we do this, we don't just shut them up, we shut their hearts up.

My 3 Cats

I have 3 cats (Inky, Lily and Kiwi) and they consistently teach me life lessons. For example, this one: How you do anything is how you do everything.

Inky: She's our fatso, she eats like a slob and she's just like a tank. She goes in head first and thinks later.

Lily: Out Hunter. She's swift, quiet and can jump the highest. If she was a person, I can see that she would strive for perfection.

Kiwi: We call her our princess. She sits like a princess, walks like a princess and eats like a princess. She's picky and she lifts her butt up in the air when she walks.

If our cats can talk, can you imagine how they would communicate with you? Inky would probably have no manners, Lily would probably be annoyed at you if you didn't get something right and Kiwi would probably listen and act pensive.

How you live your life dictates how you communicate as well. What's your lifestyle like?

Stop & Talk

Everyweek, I take a trip to Stop & Shop (The Supermarket).

You see, when I go food shopping. I know what I want and I’ve made a list of my expectations. I might also pick up a few other things that wasn’t on the list.

In your next conversation, do you know what would meet your expectations and are you leaving room for the unexpected?